So, apparently, my great-grandmother died yesterday. When I found out, I was...emotionless. Am I supposed to feel sad? Isn't that what normal people feel? Well, why don't I feel sad? Why don't I feel anything?
I wasn't close to her, and if she knew me today, she would probably severly disaprove of me. I was, oh, 15-ish last time we met....and my father made me scrub off the goth makeup and wear "presentable" clothes (mother just rolled her eyes and said "let her do what she wants!"), but he let me keep the big gothic cross. Uber-catholic great-grandmother, who then mistook the decoration for an actual sign of religion.
She had been ailing since her husband died when I was very little, four or five. Her memory was gone, and she didn't really remember anything.

Aren't I supposed to feel sad about this? How come I'm so...happy? She was tired of living, and now (if you believe in that sort of thing) she is with her husband. And even if there is nothing after death, isn't death much better than her suffering with embarrasment and frustration?

Ugh, I don't get it!